Faith Precedes Size 10: January 2014

Monday, January 13, 2014

A Baby Story...Continued

Well, he's here! This pregnancy has been one heck of a ride! The first trimester was filled with racing pulses, chest pain, difficulty breathing, and morning sickness. The second trimester was much better, but filled with absolute exhaustion and more morning sickness. And the third trimester was filled with worry, worry, worry! I worried about EVERYTHING, but especially about the baby's blood sugar levels and about shoulder dystocia, a dangerous condition that my other son had, which led to a very traumatic delivery. This little one was breech the entire pregnancy, so the doc and I also had to decide whether or not to attempt a vaginal breech delivery or whether to do a c-section. In the end, we both felt good about the c-section and we scheduled one for 11:00 am on the 27th of December.

I was supposed to arrive at the hospital that morning at 8:00 am. I set my alarm for 6:45 am to give us time to drive the kids to my brother's house in nearby Perry. I woke up on my own at 6:30, however, with mild, but frequent and regular contractions. Though I have had four children before, I was induced with each one, so I really had never had the experience of going into labor on my own. As I put on my make-up, I found myself having to sit down and take breaks because the pain was getting more intense. It was then that I realized that I needed to get to the hospital NOW! I began shouting orders and we grabbed our disheveled children and raced out to Perry, then right back into town. I arrived at the hospital at 7:45 and as I walked into the labor and delivery ward, announced that I was in labor. The nurse smiled and sent my into a room to get into my dressing gown, then left. As I waited for her to come back, I knew FOR SURE that this was the real deal and that there was no way I would make it until my 11:00 surgery. The nurse and my doctor came back into the room to find me pacing, with one hand on my abdomen and one on my back. Doc was about to begin his first surgery of the day, a hysterectomy, but thankfully, he decided to check me first. When he examined me I was dilated to an eight! Needless to say, our planned c-section turned into an emergency c-section. I was strapped into bed and rushed to the OR. Minutes later, our little man made his entrance, pink, chubby, hairy, and absolutely perfect!

As always, having a newborn in the home has been a major adjustment, but this time the emotions have been a little more raw: knowing what it took to get him here, how much I worried for his health and safety, remembering the months and months of efforts on my part to lose weight, recalling the doubts about our finances, then the moments of decision, of our choosing faith over doubt, and ultimately allowing the grace of God to bless us with this special and sweet little one. I have tried to cherish every single moment with him, and I have spent hours in the dark, feeding him and staring at his beauty. I feel so overwhelmed with gratitude and I thank God for the path that led this baby to our home.

I heard the most beautiful song the other day. It was talking about how God heals us, but leaves the scars to remind us of His mercy. I feel healed from so many heartaches, and I thank God for my new c-section scar: a constant reminder of how much I am blessed. I have a healthy baby. I am not certain if our financial difficulties are over. I have hope that tour situation is improving. Tyler was offered his old job back and recently began working there full-time again. I definitely feel that this change is, at least in part, a reward for our desire to be faithful. I know that there will always be trials, but God will lead us in our futures, as He has led us in the past. I know that I will never regret my decision to answer the call to become a mother again. Life is so amazingly good. My cup runneth over!

Sunday, January 12, 2014